Boleh ke budak pemalas ni??

Sabtu lepas beberapa minit sebelum orang menyambut 60 minutes Earth Hour, aku dapat sms dari abang aku;

"Saya nak tutup main switch...earth hour.."

Aku balas;

"Saya banyak assignment la... Jangan buat kerja gile. Nak bergelap, buat dalam bilik sendiri."

Ceritanya, ketika aku dapat sms ni, aku berada dalam bilik aku kat tingkat atas. Abang aku pulak tengah meniarap dugong kat ruang tamu kat tingkat bawah. Pemalas betul nak naik tangga ke bilik aku nak cakap dengan aku. Aku pulak malas nak turun bawah nak cakap kat dia. Alih-alih, dua-dua ekor membazir duit bil telefon dengan bersms. Kalau mak aku tau ni... habislah. Haha.

Maaflah aku ignorant dalam kempen bergelap ni. Sebabnya aku banyak assignment. Aku tak rasa lecturer aku dapat menerima alasan bahawa aku sengaja bergelap dengan menyambut Earth Hour maka assignment gagal disiapkan pada masa yang ditetapkan. Walaupun sejam sahaja, tapi masa sejam itu amatlah berbaloi bagi aku... dah la kerja menimbun... pulak tu hari ahad (besoknya) aku ada kelas dari jam 11 pagi sampai 4 petang. Tak sempat beb nak siapkan assignment.

Lagi 2 minggu kelas aku dah nak tamat sessi bagi semester ini. Lepas tu mula study week dan kemudian exam selama sebulan. Lepas tu aku masuk ke alam bekerja (insyaAllah).

Kepada Attorney General's Chamber;
Silalah ambil saya bekerja di tempat anda!
Saya mahu berkhidmat dalam kerajaan!
Saya tak malas!
Saya rajin... buat research, mencari bukti, memutar belit undang-undang...
Saya tahu buat filing untuk kes-kes sivil... terutama berkenaan dengan Injunksi.
Saya tahu buat submission untuk kes jenayah.
dan... err.. saya... nak kerja.
Saya janji saya akan berkhidmat dengan baik dan telus.

(aku rasa ayat-ayat aku ni kurang convincing time interview. Nanti la aku fikir ayat power sampai AG tu menangis terharu mendengar kata-kata aku lalu ambil aku bekerja tanpa kompromi.)

wildest dream.

Standing with your two bare feet at the edge of the concrete surface at the rooftop of a 20-storey building, with eyes closed, strong wind gushing and blowing to your face and body, with an empty mind and a wide grin... then you jump. At midair, you feel the wind is pushing even harder on every inch of your body, your stomach churn, and all you can think about is how hurtful it's going to be when your body touches the ground. But you just don't care. All you can think about is that you are now flying like nobody's business.

and that, has been one of my wildest dream.

because it's the truth.

The hardest thing to do in life is waiting for help to arrive.
The most heart breaking thing in life is when your cry for help is being ignored eventhough the tears that you shed was nothing but blood.
and in addition to that, the person who heard you cry, stood there and did nothing.
Maybe because they don't know how to help.
or maybe because they choose not to help.

One thing that we can't stop doing, us being human, is to put our hope in someone.
We know the consequences that our hope might be crushed, but we nevertheless stubbornly did it.
Nobody in this world are not selfish.
Nobody in this world do anything for nothing.
No matter how hard we try, we still anticipate for something in return.
That is how selfish we are.
When we are facing our hard times, we search for something in comfort.
Or someone to comfort us.
something that could calm us down for a while.
and as to that, we realized that we are being selfish.
and we can't help it.
We keep justifying ourselves that it's ok to be selfish at that moment in time.
But it's not.
Seriously, it's not.

and as to that, when we sat quietly down when we are facing our hard times, and realizing that it hurt too much when our cry for help is being ignored eventhough what we shed was nothing but blood...
then put no hope to anyone.
because everyone is selfish.
and the truth is that
no one can help you
but yourself.
and yeah, I know... truth hurts.

it amazed me somehow.

Sabtu lepas pengalaman pertama aku bermain futsal. Hoh! aku yang tua ini lambat nak catch-up dengan hiburan muda-mudi zaman sekarang. Masa itulah baru aku tau macam mana nak sepak bola bawah, bola atas, lepas tu tahan bola, jangan slide dan lain-lain. Best tu memang la best. Tapi, baru separuh masa pertama dah pancit. Penat seyh... :| Dah la aku tak handal bermain. nak tahan bola pun tak reti. hehe.

Keesokkan hari (hari ni ler) satu badan aku sakittt. Sampai terdemam-demam sebab badan mengalami futsal shock (hekhek). Tambah-tambah lagi, aku tak warm-up dengan betul-betul.

Oh ya, semalam aku ada tengok movie tajuk The Last Kiss (aku ambil dari external harddisk Fad... hehe..). Best ceritanya... penuh makna-makna tersirat. Aku ingat ayat dari movie ni;

Stop talking about love. Every asshole in the world says they love somebody. It means nothing.... Still doesn't mean anything. What you feel only matters to you. It's what you do to the people you said you love... that's what matters... the only thing that counts.

Maka persoalannya;
what did you do to your loved ones so far?

boiling point

Seriously... if only I have the power and willing to be thick skin, I would go for it.

One thing that I really, really hate is when someone who would go for miles to achieve his/her aims and along the way, managed to step on every single person's head. Would you call this person smart? I would call this person a *u**er.

Kadang-kadang aku rasa nak marah je memanjang... nak vent out everthing supaya benda-benda yang menjelakkan otak aku hilang. Kadang-kadang sifat kemarahan ni nak kena kawal juga. Kalau aku tak kawal... memang nahaslah. Semua orang mesti kena.

Currently, there are a few events in my life that really irks me. It bothers me so much to the extend that I feel I want to stab someone. Yes... if I'm angry, I usually vent it out. The anger would depends on the degree of what that person had done to me and since I can vent it out in MY blog (and it's nothing to do with any Sultans or their heirs)... so here goes;

To that someone: Pergi berambus boleh tak. Kalau mati awal-awal lagi baik.
To that other someone: Whatthe***?
To that other other someone: Apa masalah kau sebenarnya?

and to someone who does not fall withing the person mentioned above but managed to tip off my boiling point... all I can say is that; congratulations... you are eligble to be in my top list of my most hated person.

You are officially etched into my heart...

Eventhough I'm scared/afraid/don't-like-to-be-around-with-cats, but I think this pouch is very very cute. Seeing its smiley-cutey-cat-face really makes my day. Rasa macam giddy, happy semacam like falling in love je sepanjang hari. Btw, this pouch belongs to my firmmate, Rozianti.

Please do tell me if you guys feel the same. :)

Sorry...

Meredith: He... had all his friends. They sang and they played guitar. It's almost like he's a different person.
Christina: Well, he was.
Meredith: That freaks me out a lil bit. It's like I don't know him.
Christina: Well, I don't know Owen... We don't. We don't know them.

Grey's Anatomy.

In our everyday life, we can't help it... to NOT be ourselves. We behave differently with different persons. We laugh out loud at the person whom we liked over the same joke as opposed to someone we don't like... or least like. Our behavior are different when we're around our parents as opposed from our colleagues, and it'll be different from our lovers as opposed to our friends.

So when then are we being ourselves?

All of us are a bunch of hypocrite just because we acted differently with different person. Sometimes when you are laughing out loud, don't you ever wonder why we couldn't the same to the other person? When we cry over small matters at home, why are we behaving like we couldn't care less about the things that happen at school or at work?

And at some point, don't you ever wonder whether you are someone who is least liked by others or most lovable by others? Don't you ever wonder whether your behavior irks everybody around you?

Kadang-kadang, kita rasa diri kita bagus... tapi sebenarnya, orang lain rasa kita tak bagus. Kadang-kadang orang akan mengata kita macam-macam kat belakang... without realising that benda-benda tu semua adalah betul belaka. Cuma kita je yang tak boleh terima kenyataan dan kita rasa kita adalah mangsa keadaan.

For once, cukup-cukuplah rasa diri tu besar... rasa diri tu bagus serba serbi... rasa orang lain semuanya tak bagus. Because the truth is, orang macam ini adalah living in denial yang dia pun serba kekurangan. And I am no exception to this and for that, I want to apologize.

Who knew?

Terjemahan secara terus;

Hidup sedut!
Hidup sedut!

(ya, itu terjemahan secara terus dari perkataan Life Sucks. Okla oklaaa... terjemahan perkataan suck ialah menetek. Takkan la aku nak cakap Hidup Menetek. Apakah!)

Semasa keluarga aku nak berpindah ke rumah yang aku duduk sekarang, aku berada di Pahang... kat Matrikulasi. Jadi, aku tak sempat nak mengucapkan selamat tinggal kepada bilik dan juga rumah aku. *tiba-tiba rasa sayu*

Kemudian, setelah aku tamat belajar di Pahang, barulah aku berpeluang nak pergi menjenguk rumah lama aku. Rumah lama ni aku duduk sejak aku berumur 5 tahun dan berpindah pada umur aku 19 tahun. 14 tahun aku membesar ('besar' boleh dibaca secara literally) di rumah ni.

Aku masih ingat lagi selepas SPM, aku berjaga siang dan malam mengecat satu rumah. Aku bangun pukul 1 pagi semata-mata nak cat tangga sebab tak mahu orang lain pijak-pijak cat tak kering. Aku cat bilik aku warna biru dan purple. Ibubapa aku decide nak cat rumah sebab dah tak ada budak kecik yang suka conteng-conteng kat dinding... jadi kira selamatlah dinding-dinding yang baru dicat.

Sejuta kenangan ada di dalam rumah ini. Mana taknya, banyak perkara-perkara yang menarik yang terjadi pada diri aku berlaku di rumah itu. (I got my first period here, I burned the midnight oil to study for all my major exams here-UPSR, PMR and SPM, I got my chicken pox here, I broke my leg and had to stay in this house, I watched Titanic countless time because I love Leonardo DiCaprio, I learned how to be independant here... in short, this house became part of my life.)

Dan waktu sekarang, setiap kali aku lalu dihadapan rumah ini ada satu perasaan yang tak boleh nak diucapkan. Aku rasa macam nak halau penghuni yang duduk dalam rumah tu dan nak bawa pindah barang-barang aku balik ke dalam bilik aku.

Pendek kata, aku nak revive balik kehidupan zaman aku bersekolah and never have to move forward even an inch. Ah, mungkin rumah baru ni tak best. Sangat tak best.

Ya Allah, tolonglah... sikit je lagi...

Eeee...

Aku rasa orang yang muka cebek dan tak pandai senyum tak boleh bekerja yang ada berkait rapat dengan pelanggan. Wei, aku naik menyampah tengok muka kau, dah la servis macam hape... ingat aku ni kempunan sangat ke servis kau tu? Bluekkkkkk...

Kau tau kan nature kerja kau tu memang memenatkan dan terpaksa melayan pelanggan, jadi tak elok la kau nak buat-buat muka pulak. Aku cukup pantang orang yang suka cakap macam bagus dan jenis cakap bagus dia tu macam nak marah orang. Tak boleh nak cakap baik langsung dengan pelanggan ke?

Kalau rasa-rasa tak boleh nak handle pelanggan, baik berhenti je... kerja la cuci toilet... kat jamban tu, boleh la ko mencebek dengan sepuas hati tanpa ada orang rasa bengang kat kau. Belambak najis-najis cair, pekat, likat dan berketul-ketul menanti wajah cebek kau tu... kalau tak cukup, bukak tong rentokil tu haa... cebek la puas-puas sampai muka kau jatuh.

Eeeee... geram sungguh aku!

Dan aku tak rasa orang ni PMS... sebab memang hari-hari dia macam tu... muka macam malas layan orang.

*cebek dalam erti kata AKU ialah orang yang muka masam memanjang.*

Dari Athirah...

Aku ada kawan. Islam. Letak gambar dia pergi tattoo parlor dan buat tattoo. (sesiapa yang tahu aku cakap tentang siapa, tolong diam ok.)

Boleh tak aku nak komen kat setiap gambar dia, 'ASTAGHFIRULLAH HAL AZIMMMM' sebanyak 88 kali?

Dan cerita lain;
Lazimnya, aku memang selalu bawak paket Hadis Nutri Meal ke kelas. Nak minum waktu senggang atau waktu kelaparan mencengkam, kalau-kalau tak sempat nak pergi beli makanan.

Dan ada seorang makhluk Allah ini berkata;
"Tirah minum Hadis Nutri Meal... Lepas minum, Tirah mesti boleh bersabda... eh... silap, silap..."

Aku dah gelak terburai perut.

Pastu dia cakap lagi, "Bukan bersabda, tapi lepas ni Tirah mesti boleh baca hadith..."

Aku nak bersabda kat kawan aku yang buat tattoo tu boleh tak?